I was inspired by a post at Busy Homeschool Mom to write about things we were told about our children–prophesies of sorts spoken over them by probably-well-intentioned people who perhaps just wanted to sound wise. Or maybe that is what they knew and couldn’t imagine outside it. I’d like to think they were trying to be helpful, although I am an optimist by nature and tend to believe people have good motives.
Sadly, I’m sure there were a few who really did just want to tear us down.
“You are too strict with the boys. They listen to you now, but just wait till they are older. Once they are out of your house they will go crazy.”
They are now 32, 27, 22 (next month) and 20 (next week), and I’m still waiting for the immature, erratic behavior. The I-hate-you-for-over-restricting-me wildness they predicted. They adore one another and us, and are mature and responsible. Three are married and two are dads, and one is engaged (as of two days ago!). I’m happy to continue to wait for the madness.
“Just wait. She’ll rebel, all right. You lucked out with the boys. Girls are different.”
She’ll be 18 in May, and she is one of the most level-headed, sensible, wise, drama-free girls I have ever known. She is my heartbeat and my best girlfriend. She’s making me wait a very long time for her to become a wild child. I’m okay with that.
The truth is, nobody knew what they were talking about. We weren’t there yet so we couldn’t say with assurance that they would be all right. In my weaker moments I let myself wonder if I could just be that naive and if I could just be deluding myself. My heart knew the truth. Our children were not rebels waiting to happen.
As the years passed and these milestones of mayhem failed to happen as predicted, I began to relax more and more. I even developed humorous answers to such predictions. Eventually they stopped coming at all–especially as they kept growing up, one by one, to be wonderful.
Today, what I tell parents is to expect the very best of their children. Raise them like you expect them to be amazing people. Odds are, that is exactly what they will do.